Happy Birthday, Little Girl!

My sweet Shelby Grace turned one year old today.

As I write this post, she's probably asleep at her Texas home while her mom is in class (graduate school), and her daddy is in Iraq.

My son emailed me this morning to tell me he felt "horrible" because he couldn't celebrate his daughter's special day with her.

When I look at this little girl, I am amazed that I have a granddaughter ... that I am a grandmother.

I often want to compensate for my years (and I do mean years) of living in that place called La La Land when you look like you have it all together, but you're living behind a complete facade. Now that I live in a place called reality, but a place that's filled with hope, I want to push the rewind button and go back and raise my sons all over again, this time fully engaged in the joys and moments.

Alas, one cannot go back, but you can vow to do things better.

I think I'm a good mom to my adult sons.

I hope I'm a great Gigi to Shelby.

And in less than a month, when I head out to visit her, we are going to have a PARTY!

As she continues to master her newfound gift of walking, I'll learn from her when she falls and gets back up.

Come to think of it, I've fallen and picked myself up a few times, so maybe we can learn from each other.

I can't wait.